The Trauma of School Life Abuse, Revisit
School Life is, to be frank, a mix of emotions, but for an all-boys school where discipline and etiquette have to be maintained is a nuisance that can cause you to suffer from unconventional forms of abuse, that might traumatize you and may even cause severe anxiety and depressive disorders, where you won’t be able to even cope up with learning or even relating to others around you.
I mean how could you when you’re getting ridiculed by your classmates for not being able to even come up on top as the average student, failing to even uphold 75% in a Physics classroom, is horrible if your instructor is a deranged lunatic having Anger Management issues. Things can go very wrong, and very painful if you aren’t careful. Though living in a society where mental disorders are frowned upon, and never truly acknowledged; this behavior is acceptable.
We all have failed, although not all of us to be honest, some(most) of us fear failure.. and we never fail; we never learn and we never truly become satisfied with the effort we put in. It didn’t build tolerance in us, and thus we aren’t able to learn… Why don’t our teachers understand that Failure is necessary, for students to learn what works and what doesn’t!? That’s understandable when a fool is teaching you about something they don’t really practice. It’s foolish.. if a student isn’t paying attention, maybe try to change your methodologies to suit the student’s learning patterns, I mean that is your role right, No! It is the student’s fault, as always because it is easy to blame one side for the negligence one offers. I mean a Teacher’s responsibility is to nurture their students, to help them understand not only about the subject matter but about life in general. To develop their understanding and perspective to look forward to life, even if they fail miserably at it, they would have the tenacity to be optimistic about any situation; to smile in the face of impossibility and don’t falter…
“Ah what a dream, right! Not really, there are teachers but the percentage of actual nurturing ones, is microscopic, and if you find them, treat them with kindness and respect! Because they will give you the patience and the nurturing you deserve, no questions asked!”
So, Coming back to the school life, well Failure was unacceptable, and the Instructor would become really violent, would beat the boys who would score below the 75% grade rate, Brutal right! Yeah, it gets worse from here, He had rules, which are as follows if you ever score lower than his limit…
- Anyone, who even remotely asks a silly question, will get a thrashing.. sure the goodie two shoes were exempted, even if they remotely made a noise.
- The Thrashing was specifically aimed at the wonder kids, A.K.A The Delinquents i.e. people who scored less than the set limit. I mean sure, some students had focus problems, yeah ADHD, ADD-like me but they were treated very poorly.
- Those who would score in the 60%s well, those were the ones who would get thrashed with a big stick, and I mean as big as a baseball bat and on their buttocks, no doubt.
I remember the first time, I got that beating when I scored 66% ^^ I was slapped crazy and yeah if you make any sound or even remotely resist you will get beaten on your buttocks with that profoundly huge stick… and yes, it happened the first thrash felt like a hard swing, that was severely painful… I still remember the anguish that came with the first thrash, it was swift and immensely painful. He continued to hit me 7 more times, with the same force, and he stopped because he liked to do it slowly every day until we would improve our results… This would happen every day after assembly to the special ones, but the worst came to my dear friend, who would get 10 to 15 thrashes everyday.. so far, that he lost the feeling of even pain in that region, like yeah.. he would feel it, but there wouldn’t be any form of expression on his face.. in short, he got used to it,
and I did too but I improved so I would get one to 3 every day and he would get 10 every day in the morning at 7:30 am after the assembly. To explain the pain in words is hard… because people will laugh it away ( h a h a h a) when you’ve normalized abuse, and you have lost the ability to sympathize with people when it’s no more than a joke, to laugh about. It’s normal when it’s not. The First few hits would hurt a lot, I mean it hurts like hell, agonizing as it may be, after a while your buttocks feel the burning sensation even if you sit it hurts, you touch them, it hurts, you can’t even take a shit, because it hurts… Maybe they channel the pain to make the students focus more as a placebo to improve their studies, well it’s a simple excuse to hide their in-competencies, the behavior of instructors towards their students.
I believe it didn’t do any good to us, honestly. We learned early on life, that life sucks.. we had a lot of fun doing it. We were taught to respect our teachers, and we would even greet them with respect and the utmost decency every time we crossed paths… this was our attitude towards them even if they beat us with violence, we would beat them at the kindness that they lacked towards us. It didn’t affect us much, but it did. We channeled that pain to improve our lives. I believe we are still better off when it comes to facing failure than most people. & to us suffering, and pain; it seems like an opportunity to gain relevant insights and strengths to succeed in paths, people only dream of! Though I remember, and I’m sure most of us do, it was fun.. at least for a little while. I mean we aren’t sad that we used to get hit a lot in school. But we would go back into the school grounds in recess and just have fun.
Just as they normalized their behavior towards us, that nobody stopped that instructor from beating us, from using violence and brutality as an excuse to improve our results. We normalized our reaction towards pain, suffering, and anguish. In doing so, failure became our best friend who is always true to us. It’s the truth that never lies. And we became better knowing very well not to fall into despair, but channeling the bad, in creating peace inside ourselves.
In short, we all fail, it’s alright.. you are doing okay.. remember, even if you got the 100 percent or even if you got 1% or you made it to the average… you did it. Be proud of what you can do and acknowledge there is room to improve because there is and failure is the only lesson in life that is always frugal for ourselves and it delivers meaning and satisfaction into whatever we do.
Stay Blessed! and Remember, You got this!