The 7 Admirable Qualities Of A True Friend
Put more faith in your friends, and they will become your true friends in time.
I remember it clearly when I stood up the first time for a dear friend of mine. The bully kids were picking on him, and I couldn’t bear it anymore. So I pushed them away, the two bullies furiously staring me and told them if they even laid a hand on him, I will do something worse to them. Though a bluff in all its liking — I was but a child, still anxious but courageous. My friend attached to my side, like a frail kitten. The standoff was legendary.
It was perhaps the first time, I stood up for something true i.e. my friends. I was but a child but I couldn’t bear seeing my friend get hurt. When you’re children there are always a group of kids who pick on the weak or the lonely kids on the block. I chose to stand up for them and myself in front of those kids who thought they could get away with picking on the weak.
In all honesty, I was the weak and lonely too. But I was shown kindness from the kids who were picked on. There was nothing wrong with them. They were just chosen as outcasts just because they were socially awkward. I never liked this mistreatment towards these kids, even though I was allowed to play with the other kids. They were discarded, to sit on the sidelines to watch the others play.
One day, I felt that it was enough and with the help of a few friends we bought a few sports kits — decided to form our own cricket team. Though we sucked hard, the joys of playing together were worth it. The laughing, hustling bustling boys and girls running around the block chasing the ball and batting on their position to play. There were monumental pauses, each one of us took admiring the happy faces of what we had accomplished in but a small-time.
We had made true friends, those who understood the meaning of friendship that is welcoming the spirit of engagement and companionship. Over the years, I have adopted and understood the traits of true friends. A true friend is perhaps someone who aspires to complete a need, something we need to be fulfilled.
They will step in to vouch for you even if the situation is against them.
It depends on the situation they are presented with, if it is in their power, they will do whatever they can to help you, assist you or even be there for you when you need him the most. Most of the times friends don’t help us because of our false attitudes against them.
Nobody wants to get rejected if they are willing to help. Sadly the world we live in today — sometimes people won’t take it as it will affect their pride if they ask help from somebody.
A true friend will find an escape in any situation to be by your side when you need them the most. And if by any chance they fail to do so, forgive them as they are only human to do so like you.
They will be real with you, for you & by you.
A true friend will always agree with you when you’re right and will disagree when you are wrong. They will advise you when you seek guidance from him and will support you with the best he can with his knowledge. They will cherish your happiness and moments of sadness.
They would never backbite, nor would he/she engage in gossip against you. If they would want to say anything — they would say it to your face with the utmost courtesy, respect and care.
Treat them with kindness, as they are your real friends.
They will practice optimism and humility to make you happy.
They will cheer you up with foods, movie tickets or by simply being an idiot in front of you to make you laugh. They can be supportive of your ideas and can disagree with you when your ideas might oppose a certain group of people.
They will be sincere to you. They won’t think of deceiving you — maybe they might even take the fall for you and you might never know.
They will acknowledge your dreams, and motivate you to work for them every day. Because they truly believe in you and what you can do.
They will always be a phone call away.
They will be there for you when you need them the most. There have been moments in my life, where I thought this is it. This is how I go down but whenever I was down in dear old despair — my friends were there to save me. Even the ones, I wasn’t even in contact with for decades. They were there standing, at my mum’s call for my aid. ( P.S they are afraid of mum.)
Good friends regardless of being physically present can make you feel loved. They can take away your worries. If time moves swiftly, but it feels like minutes with them when you’re on a call — that is a clear sign of having true friends.
They take an innate interest in you because they truly care.
They will hope and pray for you even if you break apart.
Sometimes, saying goodbye to a friend hurts the most. Almost when that friend has been there through it all. Every moment of hardship, sorrow, happiness and joy — they have seen it all with you, together.
A farewell perhaps is one of the hardest things one experiences in friendships. I remember the last time I said goodbye to my dear friend. I just didn’t want to let her go but I did. Why? because I knew she will always remain in my heart until we meet again.
I hoped and prayed for that next meet hopefully, someday. Good friends remember you in their prayers, as well as their thoughts. They are always a message away(sending hope your way) sending cute cat videos to you every now and then. It’s just like showing that they are here even if they are far apart. This act of courtesy transcends the boundaries of being apart, bringing us closer to one another with each small random act of kindness.
As I previously stated — they are just a phone call or a meme away in making your day turning that frown upside down.
They will make your small moments matter.
I have had many besties over the years. One of my oldest mates perhaps celebrated all our failures. Snowcones for everybody who scored less than, 70%. Boy those were awesome days, some of us would sometime desperately fail on purpose because he was buying.
The only time he would buy was when all of us would score below average. He did this to remind us of the gold times. He did it to celebrate every accomplishment we had, even if it was making it barely to the finish line. Where if we made it to 50%, he would throw us a snowcone sundae party.
Great friends celebrate your failures as much as they celebrate your victories.
They understand the essence of failure and the opportunities it brings. He perhaps learnt this from his father, who would instead of scolding him when he’d fail — his father would congratulate in front of everyone saying “Atta boy!”
I learnt a fundamental lesson in life from him that failures are worth to be celebrated as much as victories in the journey of the ultimate goal. Even if you feel small, or tiny friends who make small moments matter are ones to keep an eye out for.
They make life’s weakest moments worth celebrating for giving us the chance to accept ourselves.
They will love you like no other.
My grandfather said to me once, “the more the love you brew in your friends, the greater of people do they become!” He was right, I have loved every friend I have ever made. Sure there are moments where everyone feels regret. Putting more trust into the person you call your friend. A friend transcends the bonds of blood. It is a bond— that truly surpasses the tests of time as compared to other relationships.
Love is the necessary component on which companionship thrives upon. Most times we fear to put our love, in the hearts of our friends. We fear we might lose them never allowing ourselves to love freely. Love is one of the sweetest of emotions in a friendship. It grows one to become complete. True friends never compromise their love for you.
“A brother is like gold and a friend is like a diamond. If gold cracks you can melt it and make it just like it was before. If a diamond cracks, it can never be like it was before.”
― Ali Ibn Abi Talib
They always are adamant in showing everyone how much you matter to them. Their words, stories, and tales always have you as an archetype in them. You are the hermit in their folklore. The qualities you undermine are perhaps a story that moves another in their hands.
It is this love that makes them true to you. Because they love you, like no other.
Anyone of these qualities if present in a friend makes them a damn good one. If these are not present — there might be some ambiguous qualities that he/she might possess which you and I cannot even comprehend unless we try to understand them better.
Thus even ruling out the fact that they aren’t a good friend. But if you are a good person then I can certainly hope that you can turn them into a great friend.
As people change in the company of great people. Treat other’s as you treat yourself and surely they will treat you the same or better otherwise in any case. It takes constant effort, faith, and love to bear a true friendship. All it needs, at the end of the day is trust and time.
Put more faith in your friends, and they will become your true friends in time.