Parenting Lessons Ripped Out of Homer Simpson’s Bible

How to Garner Respect From Your Children The Asian Way

It’s simple, shove a religious indoctrination down their throats

Homer Choking Bart — A Running Gag Spanning Decades on

Do you know how easy it is for modern parents to control their children? Well, in the southeast, there has been a trend for as long as I can remember. Ever since I was a kid, I have seen this form of imparting respect that only serves one.

It is a process where one has to bow down and take it up the ass. Because well, let’s face it if you ever even remotely err.

You deserve what’s coming to you.

Whether it’s a slipper, a fist, or even a beating.

You have to take it because you deserve it. Tit for tat, as they say, daddy’s fist on your lovely face. Or perhaps a mother’s stick on your chubby bum-bum.


Such are the simplicities of what Asian parenting is. Do you want to know something nice? It’s happening right this moment to some poor sap who barked up the wrong tree.

A religious tree no doubt that have laid down a set of generic rules to follow by one’s kin. You have to respect your parents see.

Otherwise, you will burn in hell or worse.

What’s worse than experiencing the violence imparted from the ones who love you. Well, I will give you a hint. Or perhaps two right after I eat another fist and pretend that it does not bother me too.

I have to affirm that it’s okay because it was all my fault.

I have known many kids who were often beaten with daddy’s belt every Saturday. My barber’s little brother, an acquaintance of mine.

He told me the other day, his dad beats him over every marginal shift in his behavior. Because punishing your children is a customary practice.

It’s like circumcision because you won’t be religious without it.

But unlike circumcision, it needs to be done whenever you believe your child is learning to flap their wings. You have to rip them apart and drill it down into them because they can dream to fly. But if they ever stand against your will, they will die before they even try.

Your word is the law. It’s God’s word. Don’t you know? It is said in every book you can find, and every text can serve it true. But what about the context? Well, that’s confusing too. It never was once said you could beat your kids with stones.

Break their bones with a wooden stick, and bruise their faces blue. What most is you will find is said to treat them with fairness and love. I have never even read to force something so brute.

But if you reason with your parent, who you believe is your master.

And you are their slave. Kinda like their indoctrination learned from society so cruel. Have you ever wondered about the violence that they experienced?

Perhaps they extinguish on their kids what they once saw too.

Does that seem fair, I ask you?

Would you want your kids to follow your every tone?

Just think about it for a second! Will they ever be free?

They will be alive like a puppet following your every whim. And perhaps when they become parents.

They might force their own.

It is a cycle that continues. Look what you left in the world to cause more doom. I mean it’s okay. They are your kids. You own them because you made them.

You feed them too.

You want them to be happy but on your fixed terms. Then where is the free will you vicariously speak of concerning your religions?

Is that a lie too?

Or do you believe it blindly, never understanding its truth?

You will not give up your selfish ways, even in God’s presence. You will treat your kids with discontent and want God to repay you instead.

You want him to give you heaven in return for the discipline of your child. You want him to treat you with respect on judgment day because of your sacrifice.

You want God to forgive your sins when you can not even apologize to your children.

Yes, for the treatment you have given to your kids. Oh, how they have been wronged.

The ones God gifted you with life. How will you be judged someday for the mistreatment of your loved ones when you die?

Have you ever thought about that?

Will you have time by then is, all that I ask?

It will be too late by then. There would not be any time to say.

You still have time to repent, to say “I am sorry, my dear child.

These are little words that you can say that will mean a whole to your child.

They will forgive you without regret because they love you deep inside. Your children are gifts that should not be wasted in life.

And they should be treated with kindness, beloved in warmth’s embrace.

So earn their respect by being the best parent. It won’t matter until you try.

Or choke them like homer because it’s really funny right!?

Just kidding! 😉

i often ponder… and yet i am still here to stay, will you?

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